What to Avoid When Speaking to HR

Human resources departments serve as the bridge between employees and management, handling everything from workplace conflicts to policy violations. While HR professionals are there to help maintain a productive work environment, knowing how to communicate effectively with them can make the difference between resolving an issue and creating bigger problems for yourself.

Many employees make critical mistakes when speaking with HR, often because they misunderstand HR’s role or fail to maintain proper boundaries. Understanding what not to say — and why — can protect your career and ensure your concerns are taken seriously. If you believe your workplace rights have been violated after speaking with HR, the workplace attorneys at Glaser Labor Law can assist you.

1. Keep It Professional, Always

Your conversations with human resources should maintain the same level of professionalism you’d use in any business meeting. This means avoiding gossip about coworkers, spreading unverified rumors, or making discriminatory comments about colleagues or customers.

Gossiping creates a negative work environment and reflects poorly on your judgment. HR professionals are trained to recognize unprofessional behavior, and engaging in workplace drama can damage your reputation within the organization. Instead, focus on factual information relevant to your specific concern.

Similarly, avoid making offensive or biased comments during HR conversations. Even casual remarks that seem harmless to you could be interpreted as discriminatory or create liability issues for the company.

2. Honesty Is Non-Negotiable

Never lie or provide misleading information to human resources. This cannot be overstated — dishonesty during HR interactions can lead to immediate termination and permanent damage to your professional reputation.

HR professionals often conduct thorough investigations, which means false information will likely be discovered. When caught in a lie, you lose all credibility, and your original concern may be overshadowed by the breach of trust.

Be transparent about what you know and admit when you don’t have complete information. If you need time to gather facts or documentation, ask for it rather than filling gaps with assumptions or guesses.

3. Stick to Facts, Not Accusations

This does not apply to cases of whistleblowing, workplace abuse, or sexual harassment. In those instances, you want to be clear and consistent, and this will often require an accusation. When discussing workplace issues with human resources, focus on observable facts supported by evidence rather than making accusatory statements. This is especially important when your concern involves a supervisor or manager.

For example, don’t simply say “My boss hates me and is trying to get me fired,” present specific incidents with dates and documentation: “On three occasions last month (with dates), my supervisor gave me contradictory instructions and then criticized my work for following the guidance provided.” This allows HR to come to terms and potentially accuse your supervisor themselves.

This factual approach helps HR understand the situation objectively and demonstrates your professionalism. Accusations without evidence can make you appear unprepared or emotionally unstable, which undermines your credibility, unless you suffered an instance that borders on the traumatic.

4. Understand HR’s True Role

Many employees mistakenly believe human resources exists solely to advocate for workers. While HR departments do handle some employee concerns, their primary responsibility is protecting the company from legal and financial risks.

HR is not your personal career coach or therapist. Avoid treating them as someone who will automatically take your side in disputes or help you navigate office politics for personal gain. They make decisions based on company policies, legal requirements, and business interests — not personal preferences. If HR is not doing this, then HR is not completing its goals.

Don’t share deeply personal information unless it directly affects your work performance. Details about your financial situation, religious beliefs (unless relevant to accommodation requests), or family problems should generally remain private unless they’re causing workplace issues that require company support.

5. Know When to Keep Everyday Frustrations to Yourself

Human resources handles serious workplace issues, not routine job frustrations. Complaining about minor annoyances, personality conflicts that don’t involve illegal behavior, or general workplace stress can waste HR’s time and make you appear difficult to work with.

Save HR conversations for situations involving potentially illegal conduct, policy violations, or issues that significantly impact your ability to do your job. If you’re witnessing or experiencing discriminatory behavior, harassment, or other potentially illegal activities, document everything and report it promptly.

6. Your Rights Under California Employment Law

California provides strong protections for workers, including comprehensive anti-discrimination laws, wage and hour requirements, and whistleblower protections. Understanding these rights helps you recognize when HR involvement is appropriate and necessary.

California employees have the right to work in environments free from discrimination based on protected characteristics, receive proper meal and rest breaks, and report illegal activities without retaliation. If your workplace issue involves violations of these rights, documenting the situation and involving HR becomes crucial for your protection.

However, remember that HR’s response must balance your rights with company interests and legal requirements. They may not always reach the conclusion you prefer, but they are obligated to investigate legitimate concerns and take appropriate action.

Protect Your Career and Know Your Rights

Effective communication with human resources requires professionalism, honesty, and realistic expectations about their role. Focus on facts, maintain appropriate boundaries, and understand that HR serves the company’s interests while also addressing legitimate employee concerns.

When workplace issues involve potential violations of California employment law, having experienced legal guidance can make a significant difference. Our employment law attorneys at Glaser Labor Law protect your rights as a worker and resolve labor disputes. If you need advice about workplace rights or legal assistance with a workplace issue, contact our employment attorneys by calling (310) 803-9886 to schedule a free consultation.

Glaser Labor Law

With deep roots in Southern California, Glaser Labor Law combines a focus on workplace rights with proven success in broader legal matters. Joel Glaser and his team bring decades of litigation experience to ensure every client receives strong, results-driven representation.